Artistic Expression
by Gumnut
Summary: Was it purple or blue?


Artistic Expression  
By Gumnut  
25 Nov 2005

"It was your fault."

"I have apologised."

"Still your fault."

"I don't deny it."

"So what are you going to do about it?"

"What can I do about it?"

There was a muffled sound of exasperation from the driver's seat of the Trans Am. "I don't know."

"Well, if you think of something let me know."

"Smart ass."

"Thank you."

A glare. "Still your fault."

xoxoxoxoxox

It was a factory. Preliminary scans sourced a floor plan and Kitt threw it up on his interior monitor for Michael's information.

"You've located them?"

"Two flashing red dots on the screen." Sometimes Michael asked the obvious.

"No need to be snarky."

'I wasn't."

Michael muttered something.

"Michael, really, even you have to know that that is physically impossible."

His driver glared at the dash. "Shut up, Kitt."

The AI complied. After all it wasn't his fault that the sun had come up this morning. Something that seemed to be the only reason Michael was in such a foul mood. That and the pair of thugs they were currently chasing. Petty thieves who'd managed to hold up the local grocery store. Kitt and Michael had simply been in the area when the police bulletin went out, and being the dutiful citizens they were, they took chase.

A chase that had led them here.

"They have abandoned their vehicle and are now on foot."

"I kinda worked that out, Kitt." His driver was eyeing the active floor plan. "I doubt even you could fit between those vats."

Perhaps in future he shouldn't tell Michael anything and spare himself the sarcasm. "If you should need any further information, let me know." And Kitt shut up.

That earned him a sigh. "Surveillance mode. I'm going in."

Have fun. He felt like saying it, but didn't. Michael could be so exasperating at times. He watched his driver enter the building and switched to infrared tracking to back up the signal from the com-link. Never hurt to have a triple redundancy in operation. Particularly where Michael was involved.

Whether they were arguing or not.

xoxoxoxoxox

"At least it is a nice colour."

"What? What do you mean by that?"

"Well, it could have easily have been hot pink or green. Then what would have you done?"

"The same thing I'm doing right now. In other words, nothing."

"There is always a worse situation available."

"Really? And colour would change that?"

"I'm trying to be positive."

"You're not succeeding. And besides how does this affect you?"

"It affects me. It's blue."

"It is not blue. And how does it affect you?"

"It is blue."

"It's purple."

"It is clearly blue."

"Purple!"

"Very well, have it your way."

"What the hell is wrong with you today?"

"I believe I should be asking you that question."

"It's purple."

"In which case I must be bright red."

"Give me time."

xoxoxoxoxox

It had come to be expected. Kitt could almost count down to the inevitable.

"Kitt, I need ya!"

The AI eyed the sensor feedback that represented his partner. Heart rate up, blood pressure…if Kitt could have rolled his eyes he would have. It was times like these he counted himself lucky that as an AI he didn't have blood pressure. All he could blow was a gasket.

He had considered it several times in the past.

"I'm on my way, Michael." Of course.

Ignition; he slammed the car into drive and scanned for entry points…until they started making doors a Trans Am could fit through easily, Devon was going to continue to receive property damage bills. But then their boss could growl all he liked, if there was something between Kitt and his driver when he was needed…well, he wasn't indestructible for nothing.

Scanners tracking the two thugs and his driver, Kitt ploughed through corrugated iron at the least destructive point he could find, sheet metal thrown out in all directions. A screech of burning rubber as his tyres gripped the concrete and he shot forward. High speed manoeuvring inside the building was as difficult as he had predicted, and, of course, Michael had managed to get into the most awkward of positions.

And one of the thugs was armed.

Where had he managed to obtain that? Kitt wondered. It hadn't been present in any previous scan. They'd assumed the weapon used in the robbery had been stashed somewhere. Kitt initialised secondary indepth scans in case of extra persons being involved. The building seemed to be as deserted as it had been on the first scan cycle…it was a public holiday after all.

He slipped into ski mode to navigate two of the aforementioned vats, narrowly making his way through.

"Kitt, where the hell are you?" There was the sound of scuffling.

"I am on my way, Michael."

"Hurry up, for crying out loud!"

"Yes, Michael."

Perhaps he should order a new gasket.

xoxoxoxoxox

"Michael, what is wrong?"

"What do you think?"

"If I knew, I wouldn't have asked the question."

"Purple? A little obvious don't you think?"

"Blue."

"Purple!"

"Blue."

"Haven't we already covered this?"

"It is still blue."

"I'm the boss here and I say it is purple, so it is purple!"

"You're the boss?"

"I am."

"Very well."

"No need to get snotty."

"I do not produce mucous. Besides, you're the one with the acid tongue today."

"I have reason."

"Other than the blue?"

"Purple, damnit!'

"Anything you say, Michael. After all you are the 'boss'."

xoxoxoxoxox

He made it to Michael's position just in time to see him duck behind a chunk of machinery to avoid being shot. Kitt inserted himself between his driver and the thug trying to kill him. Said thug didn't like this much and sprayed Kitt with a shower of bullets. The MBS did its job and pretty orange fireworks sprayed all over the concrete.

"Kitt, take him down. I've got the other one."

The AI responded with a squeal of tyres as he complied; back end sliding out slightly at the abrupt application of accelerator. Gun thug had caught on to the partners' intentions and was made like a rabbit once he'd realised his gun was only so much decoration when it came to the car now pursuing him.

Kitt projected his voice at the man. "I'd advise you to stop and surrender yourself."

The man yelled back at him. "Not bloody likely."

"Very well."

Still keeping a sensor on his driver who had cornered the other thief behind one of the vats and was in the process of subduing him, Kitt purposely hooked his fender on a pile of storage boxes and brought them down on his quarry. Probability gave him sufficient odds of negligible injury and a quick scan proved the result, the thug receiving a mild concussion and a dose of unconsciousness for his trouble.

Reversing, Kitt made to join Michael, but was distracted by the sudden appearance of a third person.

An armed third person.

Where had he come from!

"Michael!"

"Kitt, I'm…a little busy." No surprise. The man he was attempting to disable was obviously proving to be an equal match in skill. There would be aches and bruises tonight.

The new problem was perched atop one of the vats where Kitt couldn't reach him. And Kitt finally located the distortion in his scan that indicated the presence of lead. That was where the man had been hiding.

And now he was taking aim.

Lightning fast scans, calculations, estimated trajectories, probability factors, possible results….Michael was not going to be happy.

But he would be alive.

Enough power to the accelerator.

And Kitt threw himself at the vat of ink.

xoxoxoxoxox

"Michael, please tell me what is wrong. You have been upset all day. Long before I turned you blue."

"It's purple!"

"Did you want me to give you a breakdown spectral analysis? It is blue."

"Think you can convince me with big words?"

"Michael, I think you are beyond convincing and quite frankly whether you are blue or purple is irrelevant. What I want to know is what is wrong."

"Nothing…except being blue…damnit, purple!"

"I never thought you'd intentionally lie to me."

"I'm not lying!"

"That's a lie in itself."

"Damnit, Kitt-"

"No, Michael. You've been angry all day. Rude, sarcastic, annoyed at the smallest of things. Now I know we've only been together a few months, but I know enough of you to know that you are not yourself. What is the problem?"

"It is nothing."

"It is obviously something and I refuse to move from this spot until you explain. Your welfare is my primary mission."

"Kitt, we're in the middle of a carwash."

"You're point?"

"People are going to stare."

"I doubt I will be the centre of attention. You provide enough eye attraction for the both of us. You are blue after all."

"Purple!"

"Don't try to change the subject."

Stubborn silence.

"I'm waiting, Michael."

More silence.

"Michael?"

"You know for an AI, you can be incredibly dense sometimes."

"Uncalled for, but I'm choosing to ignore that at the moment due to your current condition."

"You know, you used to be so much more compliant when we first met."

"I learn from you, remember?"

"Well, you obviously haven't learnt to shut up."

"Michael, going on the offensive is not going to deter me."

More stubborn silence.

"Michael?"

"Damnit, Kitt, you should know why. Look at the damn date and use those super fantastic processors of yours and work it out, for crying out loud."

xoxoxoxoxox

The prow of the Trans Am didn't penetrate the metal casing of the vat, but it certainly put a great big dent in it. Kitt had calculated the precise amount of velocity required to bend the metal rather than break it. He didn't need to destroy the vat; he only needed to topple the man standing on it.

And topple him he did, the thug landing on Kitt's hood with a satisfying thump.

He also managed to displace a great deal of indigo ink, which unfortunately formed a wave over the lip of the vat and crashed down on the three men and the car below.

Suffice it to say that Michael's expression once he had managed to clear his airways of the smelly yet non-toxic liquid was not happy. He made his way over to Kitt, dragging his unconscious opponent behind him by one arm. "What on earth did you do that for?"

The Trans Am was dripping with the same blue substance that was dripping from Michael's hair. He answered mildly, "To save your life. Why? Do you think I've suddenly taken up some form of artistic expression?" Michael wasn't the only one who could play snarky.

At that point, his driver obviously noticed thug number three lying unconscious on Kitt's hood. For a moment his mouth formed the word 'oh', but he didn't say anything, simply turning back to thug number two and securing him nearby. "Contact the authorities."

"Already done."

Michael glared at him a moment, but muttered, "Thanks, Kitt."

"You're welcome."

xoxoxoxoxox

The authorities had arrived, statements were taken, and, with a few odd looks in their direction, Kitt and Michael departed the scene…both a little blue in more ways than one.

The first stop had been the car wash, much to Kitt's gratification, but Michael's continued agitation and anger worried Kitt, so he poked at his driver, attempting to find out the reason.

The date? The date was nothing special, twenty-fifth of November, but the day…it was Thanksgiving. Of course, it was Thanksgiving, the popular media had been mentioning it for weeks and he had known it was a public holiday. He tapped further information on the celebration, having not previously thought to do so.

The information filing into his processor was like a cold shower in the middle of a snow storm.

He scanned his driver. Still agitated. Tired, as usual. Still angry.

Still blue.

And without his family.

"I'm sorry, Michael."

The man in his driver's seat looked down at his hands. "Not your fault."

"But I should have known."

"You're young, Kitt, you can't be expected to know everything."

"I still should have known."

"Yeah, well now you do. And there is nothing you can do about it anyway, so don't worry about it."

Soap suds continued to dribble down his windows and across his scanner. He still hadn't moved from his spot in the middle of the wash cycle. Several attendants were getting rather agitated about it.

At least the ink was coming off the car.

"Michael, we should get you to a motel and cleaned up."

"I don't think it will come off easily, Kitt. It was labelled 'permanent'. I'm going to be blue for days."

"I thought you said it was purple."

That earned him a glare, but it was half hearted. Michael seemed more depressed now than angry.

"I have a lot to be thankful for." Kitt said it quietly as he unjammed the carwash mechanism and they started moving forward again.

Michael's eyes flickered at the voice box, but he didn't say anything.

"I'm extremely thankful for you."

"You sure about that?" His tone was self-derogatory.

"I've never been more sure of anything, Michael." And it was true. The man still dripping indigo ink onto his upholstery was more important to him than anything else in the world. A quiet and simple statement. "I'm yours."

Michael's eyes flickered at the dash and he looked as if he was going to say something, but stopped himself. The car wash chose that moment to come to an end and the black Trans Am emerged out into the golden tones of the setting sun, paintwork as brilliant as ever.

The carwash attendant looked to be somewhere near apoplectic, but Michael simply waved a blue hand at him and drove off. They merged into the light traffic and headed for the motel they had left early that morning.

On a whim, Kitt rang ahead and ordered room service, charging it to the Foundation. He chose turkey.

The motel had a nice balcony…

"Michael, would you like to share a Thanksgiving dinner with me?"

His driver blinked. "Huh?" His thoughts had obviously been miles away. Sometimes Kitt wondered how the human mind didn't run the car into a brick wall for lack of attention to the road.

"I've ordered a dinner, would you like to attend?"

"Oh, uh, I guess." Michael frowned slightly at the dash again.

"Then I shall see you on the balcony at 7pm."

"Okay." There was a look of incredulity spreading across the man's face.

"Something wrong, Michael?"

"Uh, no." He seemed to gather himself. "Thank you, Kitt."

"You're welcome."

And the remainder of the trip settled into mostly silence. Mostly because as they drove into the motel's driveway, Kitt couldn't resist one last line. "It matches your eyes, you know."

No snarky comeback. No anger.

Michael simply smiled.

xoxoxoxoxox  
FIN.


End file.
